I think there's plenty to worry about between the ages of 4 and 10 without adding oral sex to the mix yet. I'm not saying that you shouldn't plan ahead, but I don't think you have to put the cart before the horse.
What specifically are you looking for in a book, Wren? I could name several that might be useful, but most of the ones I turned to after Ruf were less general and more specific to my particular child's situation: HSing the gifted child, visual-spatial learner stuff, etc. The other general one people frequently like is the Gross book.
Keep in mind, there's not a whole lot of books out there on HG+ kids! GT kids in general, there's some stuff (though not as much as I would like). But HG+ kids? Slim pickings!
Maybe it would help for you to tell us what questions or concerns you have, and perhaps we can recommend something to help you with that problem or question?
I know you mentioned being disappointed with Ruf's work because she offered no help with how to talk to the school about your child. (That's why I mentioned the how-to thing, since it sounded like you wanted something more practical, less about understanding and more about action.) Are you looking for advocacy help?
