I feel your pain. One line from report: when asked what she would change dd8 said dd14 does not her come into her room and closes her door. Now I have "Do you want to build a snowman stuck in my head! smile My brother and I are also 4 years apart and fought a lot at those ages. For us it was a phase. But, I feel sad about the current state of sibling relationships here. You aren't alone.