He still has a period of time during the day when he's sad, a part of the day when he's really tired, and a time of day where he's almost euphorically happy. Then he gets manic when it wears off. These are not drastic mood swings. In fact they are quite subtle, but it's enough that I certainly notice them. When he doesn't have the medicine, he's absolutely unable to focus and concentrate on much of anything these days. But, I do get to see his personality more. I can't decide if it's his personality that's so different or if I'm just not used to him being so calm and unintrusive. I'm used to him being stuck to me every minute we're together, saying, "mom, mom, mom, you know what....listen to this...can I?...." Now, I look around and he's in him room playing alone silently...and it makes me kind of sad. Usually, his mouth doesn't stop. He literally thinks out loud. Well, before Vyvanse. Am I crazy? Am I just mourning the "loss" of my immature, inappropriate boy instead of embracing the mature, motivated, loving young man that I am currently living with?
I think you probably are mourning a loss here. Ever hear of Stockholm Syndrome? OK, I'm exaggerating for comic effect, but there is a whole kernel of truth to this joke.
It's ok for you to be having feelings right now - you've been through so much. Does he mind the 'sad period?' If not,and if it's no worse than you've described above, then
I strongly urge you NOT to play with his medication dose this week. He has a lot to mourn as well, now that he sees how mature he could have been these last few months. For all you know he is still adjusting to the dose he is on, and in another week all these subtle shifts may be gone all by themselves.
Go back to your basic 'Energizing the Positives'
When he is sad say: 'I love the calm wisdom you are showing right now.' or 'I love how you are handling your feelings right now.'
When he is tired, compliment him on how well he is handling himself, even though he is tired.
When he is euphoric celebrate with him how good he feels.
I'm not promising that you won't eventually change drugs or dosages, but I can promise that if you cut his does in half right now, you are sending a message that you aren't sure that you want him to grow up and be this new mature self. Give yourself the gift of a little more time. We don't have to be hypervigilent all the time, yes?
BTW - I'm currently reading Deirdre Lovecky's 'Different Minds' which is about her experiences with Gifted kids of various levels of giftedness who also have ADHD, NVLD or AS. Fascinating!
Love and More Love,
Grinity
