You're not kidding, CFK! LOTS to worry about. I'm about to worry myself sick over this whole med issue. While my ds6 is certainly able to complete more work, is more compliant, and is calm most of the day, I feel like there are too many moments that I'm missing the essence of his personality. I am really hoping there's some balance somewhere, some magical medication or dosage that will not only allow him to be himself but also allow him to excel. He still has a period of time during the day when he's sad, a part of the day when he's really tired, and a time of day where he's almost euphorically happy. Then he gets manic when it wears off. These are not drastic mood swings. In fact they are quite subtle, but it's enough that I certainly notice them. When he doesn't have the medicine, he's absolutely unable to focus and concentrate on much of anything these days. But, I do get to see his personality more. I can't decide if it's his personality that's so different or if I'm just not used to him being so calm and unintrusive. I'm used to him being stuck to me every minute we're together, saying, "mom, mom, mom, you know what....listen to this...can I?...." Now, I look around and he's in him room playing alone silently...and it makes me kind of sad. Usually, his mouth doesn't stop. He literally thinks out loud. Well, before Vyvanse. Am I crazy? Am I just mourning the "loss" of my immature, inappropriate boy instead of embracing the mature, motivated, loving young man that I am currently living with? Ahhh...rambling again. Why does this have to be so hard? I know many other people deal with much bigger issues than this, so please don't think I'm feeling sorry for myself. Just want to figure this out and help my little man.
