Hi all, please help. So I am getting an ADHD eval for my son and I gave his teacher, among other things, the BASC-2 scale to complete. She returned it to me in a sealed envelope, though I had originally asked her just to send it to the facility. She returned it to me b/c I had forgotten she cannot talk with DS's medical team or doctors without me signing a release. So, I looked at the scale. I mean, it is MY kid, right? SO, I was totally prepared for her ratings to be more harsh, particularly in areas of inattention. Obviously, there are issues, particularly school ones, that is why I am getting an eval for him. But many of her ratng seem way over the top. Let me say also, that my son is not a typical ADHD presentation on terms of the kid who was always running around, disruptive, etc. He is absolutely inattentive in certain situations. But he's not a disruptive guy. She put he "always disrupts other children's activities;" he "always disobeys," "always breaks the rules" "never encourages others to their best" "always bothers children when they are working." He "always fails to complete his tests" (what the heck - I get all of his tests home, I think, not only are they complete but they are always %100); "always acts without thinking" And, get these two: "always seems out of touch with reality" and "always does strange things"! Also, she put "often" for "acts strangely." And is "often chosen last for games" (this breaks my heart but he never complains of this, and has a best friend at school (they have sleep overs and have been friends since kindergarten;) and the two of them seem to have a bit of a group... Oh, and she put he is "never liked well by children of the same sex" and is "never a good sport" This kid I know and see is SUCH a good sport. Having EDS and being weaker and uncoordinated renders him HAVING to be a good sport. I watch him play chess and he is good sport about that too. This is a kid is used to losing and used to struggling (like swimming and writing). I am actually very proud of what a good sport he is. Unlike my adorable younger child who is very assertive and HAS to win. LOL.
These simply do not comport with the kid I know and it's not like I don't spend much time with him. I know him really well and have been observing him a lot. I also observe him at school when I volunteer (Last year I went every week to his class and helped out in the background so I got to watch him a lot and he didn't even know I was there at times). I realize that I am not there all of the time but these replies seem very extreme.
I have sort-of been here before. In pre-school I gave this form to DS's pre-school teacher to fill out as part of an eval to get DS OT for his hypotonia and delayed fine motor (which we now know is due to Ehlers Danlos). Same thing happened where the teacher put really disturbing and seemingly extreme ratings. I emailed the teacher about it b/c all of the extreme ratings were never brought to my attention before and some of them I KNEW weren't true like "always has potty accidents" (I would know b/c he'd come home with the soiled clothes). That teacher admitted in writing that she "exaggerated b/c you need to exaggerate to get a child help." When I showed that to the eval team they disregarded the scale. However, in kindergarten, when I had DS evaluated his kindergarten teacher filled out scales and I saw them and also he was quoted extensively in the report and he was very accurate. Last year DS had more than one scale filled out by his teacher. Again, hers seemed more accurate to me.... I mean he's always rated way more "inattentive" and such than I see at home but nothing extreme that I noticed.
So, I am not sure what to do. On the one hand, should I sit down with her about these items and confront her and ask for specifics? If they are true I feel like he must really be unhappy at school and perhaps I should seriously consider pulling him.
On the other hand I feel like I should just realize that these teachers seem to exaggerate for whatever reason particularly when they think you will not see the scale, and just move on. I mean, the chances of him getting an adhd-inattentive diagnosis is probabaly pretty damn high ... I doubt this will really makes any difference.
HAs anyone had this experience. Is it possible my kid is really THAT OFF perhaps having some personality disorder or mental illness and my husband and I are in some serious denial?
SO heartbreaking to read this stuff about your own kid. Especially when the kid you see is so cool and creative and sweet and smart
