While the list would help, I doubt that they wouldn't play if they forgot their cleats. (I actually have a list for overnight tournaments, so they could easily access that on my laptop.) Either someone would retrieve the cleats (me, DH, grandparents, another team parent) and would get them there before the start of the second game, or they could borrow footwear. Maybe there wouldn't be an extra pair of cleats, but certainly players and moms would have sneakers (and my kids wear a very common size).
If I didn't enable, certainly another parent or coach would. This approach is easier with school stuff though, since other parents would not be enablers.
I think that DD18 has gotten better over the past few years since she has had to pack her own bags for various overnight trips. Also, now that she is 3 hours away, we can't be running things to her, so she has to figure it out herself. I suspect DD16 will get better once she is off at school. DD9 doesn't seem to have as much of an issue with forgetting stuff.
