It would be less about homeschooling and more about just backing off and taking a break, lowering expectations and not having so many power struggles, resting, recuperating.
The minimum he'd have to do for schooling: finish Algebra I, do the required content for Social Studies, English, and Science
This is a minimum? It doesn't sound like unschooling to me. It sounds like schooling, except at home and without anyone else to talk to. Personally, I think you'd be setting yourself up for power struggles that surpass what you've seen already.
You've said in many posts that your son has trouble getting stuff done at home. Why would this change if he's suddenly forced to spend
all of his time at home? My eldest is homeschooled and he's very self-motivated. Even so, I have to guide him quite a bit.
He seems unmotivated, lazy, off-task, no sense of time, can't give up "now" for what will benefit him later (stop playing and put on your baseball uniform so we can go to your game). The doctor said to me at our last appointment that I am being son's "frontal lobe".
I didn't understand what you meant here until I read this:
...yesterday, he got home at 4:30 and had a snack and then went to piano lesson, and got home about 5:40. I told him to get right on his homework because he had a scout meeting at 7 and he asked for 5 minutes of downtime. So, 5 minutes later, I told him his time was up, and to get busy. He finally got around to getting his homework out at about 6:20. I have no idea what he was doing in that time - daydreaming, creating sand castles in his head, solving the mystery of the universe, who knows? Ten minutes later, supper was ready so he ate and went back to his homework about 6:40. He "worked" on it until 8:00 when I told him to put it away and play with his dad. "What'll I do about it? It's due tomorrow?". I told him I didn't know but that he had had plenty of time to do it. Then, he realized that he had missed scouts and started calling himself stupid.
I think, too, that right now the Strattera is making him very tired - yesterday he fell asleep at 5:15 and I started waking him up at 6 so he could go to his baseball game. It took him 30 minutes to fully wake up.
So, he was in school or in a scheduled activity from around 8 a.m. until 5:40 with exactly 5 minutes off? This isn't downtime by a large margin. And then he had another scheduled activity at 7? And he's on a baseball team? This seems to be a
very heavy schedule. Maybe he's just worn out (or burning/burnt out).
Also, you seem very negative about daydreaming. I believe that many developmental professionals say that significant solitary time spent in unguided thought or pursuits is essential to healthy development.
Just wondering: is this a typical evening? If so, I can understand why he might rebel. But I don't think he was "stupid" because he missed Scouts. I also don't it's healthy for a anyone to be "on" from early in the morning until close to bedtime, and certainly not a child.
The teachers report that he is somewhat immature but overall doing well, is helpful, is organized (he was selected as section leader in the 8th grade band, hah!), is polite, etc.
I'm confused. Why did you say "hah!" here? Is being a section leader a bad thing? Overall, from what you've written, he seems to be having relatively few problems in school and more issues at home.
I looked at husband ... [he] said "she wants him on medication". Argh! So, the doctor reviewed notes and went over it all and told me I looked worn out...
Gentle suggestion: maybe you're overinvested here.
I'm only making comments based on what I've read. I know that what I've written may not be what you want to hear, but from what I've read, homeschooling --- especially if he's against the idea --- doesn't sound like a good idea. Have you thought about asking him if he'd like to ease off on his activities? If so, let HIM pick which one(s) to drop, not you.
