Petunia, I know that I commented in your 'piano' thread about some eerily similar things that I noticed about your DS and my DD13 when she was your son's age.
I would also have said that school wasn't "the" problem-- and probably DID, at least at the time.
But it was. It was so clearly the problem that within days of the end of the term, it had become unbelievably clear that my kid had nothing in particular "wrong" with her that wasn't about school.
We also battled over seemingly everything-- bedtime, computer usage, eating (we were doing weekly weigh-ins for a while), sleeping habits, hygiene, homework (and how)... just everything.
She was still a straight A student during this semester, which boggles my mind.
In the end, it was all about task-avoidant perfectionism run AMOK. It wasn't an eating disorder. It wasn't ADD (though we had a psych team fairly determined in that same area, too-- we cancelled with them once EVERY behavior resolved within three or four days of school ending).
You might hunt up that thread(
Deterioration/perfectionism thread) from a few years ago. I have to agree with ColinsMum that homeschooling with an eye toward finishing some "core" subjects is
probably not the best idea here, if my intuition about what you're seeing is correct.
It's possible that this is a fairly common stage that HG+ kids go through between 9 and 12 years of age. At least those who have the right cocktail of personality traits, that is. In DD's case, the worst of it was the spring just before she turned 12.
DH and I found it nothing short of harrowing. DD seems to have weathered it with few if any ill effects. She has since shed some light on her twisted reasoning and priorities during this bizarre period of her life; apparently, she was prioritizing
Pokemon as an obsessive, addictive interest. She regrets that, by the way-- and the thing is, we weren't really able to "stop" her from indulging in it because of her cleverness at finding ways around our firewalls, both physically and electronically.
I don't have any real advice other than for you to look carefully at what your son DOES place a premium on (especially if he's hiding it from you), and ask whether or not your gut is telling you what the problem is.
