Originally Posted by Ametrine
Originally Posted by Madoosa
WRT your father - maybe they just need to spend time together alone.. would that be an option? they may find each other that way, it's working with my FIL and my boys - they are building great relationships and he is finally understanding exactly how advanced they really are.

Thanks for sharing the situation in your family. I feel better knowing that it must be a difference in individual perception sometimes. (My mom says ds is a "smartie").

I was thinking that I would ask my mom to lunch and see if my dad would "babysit" for an hour. Actually, I'm scared to ask because I'm almost positive my dad will think I've "lost it" that I would think he's interested in watching my son. But I agree with you that if only he would give him a one-on-one chance to talk with him, he would see.

I've often noticed my son is a bit "incoherent" and "hyper" around my dad...all the while, he's looking at him like he's thinking, "Am I getting grandpa's attention?" He's definitely different at home. I suppose I'm seeing some social awkwardness emerging in my son at this point.

Until your father treats your son like something more than "just a baby" this behaviour will continue. Both my boys are more silly and babyish around my IL's - esp MIL, since it is what she expects from them - and it's what is conveyed to them by word and action. My MIL still wants to help DS4 go to the toilet to pee -offering to pull his pants down and up for him (he has had this down pat for the last 2 years). She calls him "my baby" and when he wants to show her anything she tells him not to worry you are too young to do that, go and play rather."

so around her he acts more silly. And when we are there with him and her, you can tell he is torn on how to act - and we have more bad behaviour than usual because of the mixed emotions. But as soon as I chat to him on the side about something he loves, he starts to stabilise again and be more himself - despite trying to hide it from them. (does this make sense?)

Mom to 3 gorgeous boys: Aiden (8), Nathan (7) and Dylan (4)