Well, the fact is that these feelings are VERY common among parents of HG+ kids, and they are often, frankly, rather surprising to those same people. We often get posts after GT ID or some change in a school situation asking why the poster feels as if she is grieving some loss. But it does make sense, I think, in context.
As for having kids who are happy and healthy being enough. I agree in theory. I also know that GTness in an unfriendly classroom made my son VERY unhappy to the point of being unhealthy. Did it make me wish he weren't GT? No. But DH and I had to act to prevent damage from being done to his fragile 6yo self-concept and his emotional health, not to mention his intellectual development. That felt a lot like a medical problem: scary, unknown, risky. It sure sapped my strength...and all joy from my son's life.
So GT is not unrelated to that happy and healthy that you seem to think of as pretty basic; happy and healthy was quite complicated for us--downright elusive, in fact--for a while there.
It sounds like you haven't had to mourn the loss of anything. Your child's education has been good for him, his school is responsive and supportive...and hooray for that! May you never understand why some of us feel as we do!
