Wow - that is great RRD - not that he is having trouble on the playground, but that he is so emotionally aware and articulate!
My DS8 - I can see that he is emotionally sensitive, but he cannot articulate it - not even to tell me he is happy or sad. So he either shuts down his emotions when they get too intense (and then people think he is uncaring), or he acts out. It can be very confusing!
He is certainly not alone with the playground issues - neither of my kids wanted to play soccer at recess. It certainly cut down on the number of kids they could play with - but they have both found other kids to interact with during breaks.
And it can be really hard to sort out the can'ts from the won'ts. Throw in a little (ok a lot) of stubbornness (parents and kids) and oh boy - it's hard!
When I remember - I find it's best to drop the issue (whatever it is) and come back to it when everyone is calmer.
Given your DS's self-awareness - I'm betting things will get easier as he gets older.
