I just love this forum. I love that it's possible to have these thoughtful discussions with other parents who have a solid understanding of these types of issues.
syoblrig: I agree 100% that gifted kids need to behave as much as anyone else. To that end, we do sticker charts, positive reinforcement and consequences. We also have lots of chats about emotions, we try to incorporate a bit of yoga and meditation here and there, we read books about emotions, and invite them to go to their room if they need to calm down. We have had a parenting coach who was of great help, but has since retired. We're definitely doing what we can. I do like your concept of the Mitzvah, and will talk to DH to see if we want to incorporate that as another tool.
My question is more whether we need to be doing discipline "differently" with him, and to what extent. I can tell you with absolute certainty that when he isn't "buzzing", he is a kid with a huge heart. He also adores his little brother and they are wonderful friends. Bottom line is, I think he mostly has a hard time controlling his emotions. He is always "more" of everything, whether it's good or bad.
HJA: We may actually start sessions with a psychologist soon. As far as I'm concerned, it's just another tool to add to their toolbox for good mental health. If it's a good fit and he likes it, I'd like to continue for a while. I just see it as a great way to help him manage the big emotions. By the way, I sent you a PM about something else.
Ashley: I actually used the "Thank you for not doing X" trick a lot last night. Don't remember where we picked it up but yes, it seems to help.
howdy: That's exactly it. You just expressed it more accurately/succinctly than I did.
Whenever he's acting out because he's anxious for example, we find that the most effective way to bring him around is to help him express his feelings. If instead he's acting out because he's in a bad mood, the best approach is probably a consequence. It's just hard to know which is which sometimes.
Generally, it seems that GC aren't simple to parent!
