Eco, you're so right. Problem is, I can't book the friend the way I could book a class! And guess who in our house is responsible for setting up the play dates, and who gets to moan when I tell him that I won't be home and it's his job to do pick ups or drop offs or run interference when tempers fly as opposed to just get mad and yell.

I'm not looking at sports as a panacea. It's just about one set of his needs to be met, ie exercise, outdoor time, sensory diet, and yes, social recognition.

I never made it as far as being one of the sporty kids who get to pick the teams, but God, how I LOVED suddenly being among the first or second tier of pickees once I started working hard in gymnastics class. Getting medals and honours certificates for doing well on sports day (as opposed to the mere commendation I got before, or the simple certificate of participation poor DS gets) was such a boost for my sorry self confidence. And DS8 is not immune, at the ski resort we go to all kids get a medal for successfully completing class, and they all treasure them.

DH remembers the tremendous boost he got in confidence when he found out during the school ski trip that he was actually quite good at something for a change! and best of all, his PE teacher who was their instructor found out as well and suddenly treated him with a lot more respect back home even though he kept bumbling his way through games, realizing it was about fit and not about laziness or opposition. He also was the kind of kid who'd just roam the woods on his bike, and later, go on over night bike tours with friends by the time he was thirteen. I don't think DS would do that, now or later. Not sure I'd let him, TBH!

So, it's not that DH doesn't understand. I think he's just as overwhelmed as I am, and digging in and refusing to engage is his way of showing it. Yup, apple and tree here, for sure.

I have an idea. With a disabled child, we're eligible for three weeks family rehab every four years at lest and haven't taken any yet. I'll try to set something up in the mountains in February or so, take him out of school, not that he's missing anything, and we'll go skiing as much as we can!

Last edited by Tigerle; 08/12/15 04:17 AM.