Does your DS have a good friend? One he can invite over to play and vice versa? That might help and be easier than trying to find all of these organized activities. Just a thought. It sounds a bit like he's decided that he doesn't fit in because of sports, but maybe it's really something a little different and what he's lacking is a social connection to peers?
I understand completely about the lack of time because of other demands, and also the sibling squabbling, which can be exhausting. I'm wondering if a gestalt shift might work better: instead of focusing on something "out there" that might provide a fix, maybe strengthening relationships and connection at home, and trying to develop an important friendship, would help him feel more centered and secure in himself.
I feel for you (and relate to you). It seems you have overwhelming needs at home and lack support. My sense is that adding more is not the immediate answer. Those are just musings from a fellow traveler.
