What I don't consider a good approach is excusing behavior that's disruptive or disordered or distressing on the grounds that the child is gifted.
I agree. In our case, we never "excused" anything. I read lots of books, and used a lot of 'strategies'. She received an IEP (based on ADHD diagnosis) and support and services at school. A lot of people have worked really hard (especially me!) to help her; it's just impossible to know what would have happened otherwise.
There are two things that we chose not do:
1. Pay out of pocket for any assessments or services.
2. Put her on any medications.
I'm not saying that these are bad; I know that many people have gotten good results from private consultations and/or medication. I'm only sharing my personal experience.