FWIW, from my perspective your situation is slightly different than Irena's situation putting a 2nd grader into a 3rd+ class. I would have been frustrated with that - we've btdt that with our ds at that age with a similar age difference, and it worked out a-ok.

In this situation, you're looking at sending a 4 year old who most likely hasn't been attending full-day regular school yet into a group that is geared for 2nd+ graders who have a few years of schooling behind them + are several years older. Does that mean they know more about math or are as highly capable in math ability? Not at all! But it does mean they are most likely operating on a different maturity level re social situations, which is a large part of what the person leading the group is going to be dealing with. I agree with Quantum:

Originally Posted by Quantum2003
I highly suspect the issue has nothing to do with math achievement although the librarian and the teacher are likely skeptical of your claims as well.
I suspect the real issue has to do with the perceived maturity of your 4-year-old as well as your required presence. I seriously doubt that the parents of the 2nd to 4th graders will be sitting with their children as they have been in schools for years. Perhaps this teacher would feel more comfortable without a parent hanging around and/or thinks the children will be more focused without a parent hanging around.
Perhaps you can let them know that your child is mature enough not to need you to hang around. Although that may not work either if they don't want to be responsible for such a young child.

I'll also add something else in - it's possible that while you're looking at this activity as an enrichment activity for a child who is highly capable and loves math, the real purpose of it might be to encourage children who *aren't* wildly in love with math or as highly capable to see themselves as capable and to see math as fun. I have one of those kids in my family, alongside an EG kiddo who absorbs math just by breathing. My math-y EG kiddo didn't particularly have all that much fun at activities like this.

Best wishes,

polarbear