Originally Posted by madeinuk
I couldn't give a hoot what others think - this is not about a race - I do not need my DD to think that she is better than others at all.

Ah, but if your child is going to Harvard or Yale, it IS a race. Because once they show up at the doors to one of those schools, power and wealth are secured.

And so, the child MUST be valedictorian, and no matter that there are 4 hours of homework a night. The child also MUST fill out other areas of the college application, by election to class president, leading the debate team, starring in the school musical, winning the state tennis tournament, participating in the academic decathlon, and volunteering in the homeless shelter.

The result will be a child who sleeps three hours a night, has no close friends, and does not socialize in any meaningful way. The child will also have no executive functioning skills, because there has never been a time when the child wasn't involved in some sort of carefully organized activity. So, lacking any ability to function independently, suffering from severe mental issues, and unable to connect with other people, they arrive at Harvard and Yale. But don't worry, there's an effective support system at the universities to help them get through... just like if Mom were there. Plus, there's still more competition to be had, and at this point, that's all the kids know.

And then they graduate, with all these same problems, and go on to lead the boardrooms and political chambers of the country. The products of such an environment that rewards competition at all costs might go into politics, where they'd be expected to accomplish nothing other than being re-elected, and turn the halls of power into nothing more than an absurd theater for a perpetual election cycle, right? Or, they might go into finance, where a win-at-all-costs attitude leads to the reckless pursuit of short-term gains, at the expense of stability of the overall market, right?

So yeah, it's a good thing those things never happen. wink

It's very much an arms race. If you play the game, you lose. And if you don't play the game... you lose.