It sounds like you are thinking of an assessment for autism that is not linked to an assessment for intellectual ability.
However, if you go to someone who specializes in autism spectrum disorders but does not understand giftedness, the specialist can see behaviors (like not playing with kids at day care) as a sign of autism, while it can also because a highly gifted child wants to interact with intellectual peers. It's complicated.
Going to a specialist who can tease apart this complex situation can often be of enormous help. This would be someone who has experience working with 2e (twice exceptional) children. It is too young to test for giftedness per se, but it should be considered when looking at a diagnosis.
Two readable, well-researched and well regarded books that I would recommend are:
- Misdiagnosis and Dual Diagnoses of Gifted Children and Adults: ADHD, Bipolar, Ocd, Asperger's, Depression, and Other Disorders (Webb et al)
- The Mislabeled Child: Looking Beyond Behavior to Find the True Sources and Solutions for Children's Learning Challenges (Eides)
I read sections of these books over and over when my kid was little-- and not playing with kids his age:)
These books really helped clarify when a behavior can relate to (1) only autism (2) only giftedness, and (3) BOTH presenting in the same person.
These books can also be shared with a professional unfamiliar with giftedness.
Also: listen to your gut. If your gut says there is a problem (you seem to suspect something is going on) you very well may be right. However, it might not be what you expect. For example, I was worried my child lacked social skills in large groups and looked into autism--turns out he had a hearing problem and couldn't hear what was happening or when people were talking to him!
Good luck in your research and explorations.
At the end of the day, you still have the same great kid, so enjoy!
