As for what has happened since he was pulled out, we decided to get an educational assessment. The school also recommended an evaluation from an occupational therapist. The assessment confirms he is gifted and in need of acceleration. The therapist has diagnosed him with retained infantile reflexes. The OT comes to our house and teaches him exercises once a week.
My sister in law, who is a pediatrician, and the psych. who evaluated him think the OT stuff is a fringe science and question it's validity. However, they both agree it can't hurt so if we are willing to pay for it whatever. Their position is "school was a bad fit, he's still a little guy, and he might never act like all the other kids and that is okay". Of course, throwing sand or hurting someone is not okay and he knows that. They mean his intensity will probably always be a part of his personality.
I know how you feel after that meeting. I have been there within the last six months and I felt horrible. Take heart that you have a better situation on the horizon. We are still trying to figure out what to do next year.
