Thank you all SO much for the responses. utkallie - thank you especially. It's one heck of a roller coaster ride, isn't it?
The main issue I have with NOT knowing is - where do we go next? I feel like I'm just winging it along here as a parent, and I desperately need some kind of solid ground to base my parenting decisions on. With the Aspergers diagnosis, I read everything I could on the subject, trying to get a map in place of sorts of what steps I should be taking with my child, what therapies he needs, what should the school be doing, in order to guarantee him success as an adult. I took each of his current challenges and tried to find a reasonable solution that we could try - and none of the ones suggested by the Aspergers books would work with my son! Minimize change in routines? He CRAVES that, he asks to take a new way home from school as a reward for having a good day! I was getting so frustrated that I just knew in my heart that this isn't the route we should be taking. I wasn't getting the answers I needed. That's why I'm now pursuing the gifted route to see if THOSE solutions might work. Plus, we're spending countless hours and money in therapies right now for a problem he may not even have. While the therapies in their own right may not hurt, they are taking up time that could be used for extracurricular activities such as science camp and the like that could enrich him as a gifted student. I want to make the most of every day for him, not subject him to OT that he hates and doesn't even need. But if he DOES need it, then I don't want to be the one to make the decision to cut it off, KWIM?
He's at a good equilibrium right now. He hates school because he's bored (with the exception of the 1 hour a week he gets pulled for G&T), but his behavior is finally on track and his work is fine. He's only been sent to the principal's office once this year, as opposed to 2-3 times a week last year. But I also know that behavior waxes and wanes with these kids. I've heard things tend to start up again around age 8, and I would really love to know the driving force behind WHY he does these things so I'm not flailing and trying a billion different approaches when the next hurdle hits. Because that has been my MO in the past, and it's exhausting. There has to be an easier way - not a parenting manual per say, but at least a more narrowed list of options to try.
That google map was invaluable. We don't live remotely near any of the psychologists listed, but we will be traveling to Denver for Spring Break next year. I will contact the center there and see if they can work with us. What would I ultimately love to hear? That we've seen this type of kid before, that my child is X,Y and Z, and here are some good resources to check out. Is that too much to ask?
