I've been checking out other preschool options more carefully and may have found a possible alternative to what DS4 is in now. I feel so relieved to have found even another possibility in our remote area! This school is a perfect example of a preschool style being determined by the teacher rather than the name on the sign, and why it's worth it to visit every single school.

This new one is an AMI montessori and the sign implies a heavy faith basis, but as it turns out the individual teacher is so relaxed in philosophy that most of what I saw during "work" time was actually free social play. It's spiritual side is limited and seems not too different than the time devoted to the pledge of allegiance at the old school.

It's small, and 3 of the kids are noticeably older than DS. The book the teacher read at group time had lots of words per page, actual text. They had actual conversation at group time. The group time was short. The teacher:student ratio is 1:5. There are downsides like time it starts and ratio of genders and intolerance of aggressive looking play-acting, but overall it seems like a way better fit.

There is not a kid who slaps other kids when the teacher isn't looking (at least I didn't see one), and no teachers saying phrases like, "zip your lips" in a semi yell, both things I saw when I observed recently in his current preschool.

So the next step is having DS go to the new one for a visit. We have had an awful lot of change in the last months so I really don't even know how to approach the idea with him -- as unpleasant as I now personally find his current school, he is used to it at this point and it's a lot to consider changing. My plan is have him visit the new one a few times "just to check it out" and make his own decision about where to attend.

I would be really interested to hear from anyone who considered switching preschool/K type schools part way in and had their child attend days at the new one before exiting the old. How did you approach that with your child? What did your child decide? Did any decide to stick with their old school just out of being in a comfortable rut with it? Did they choose the new school just because it was novel rather than fundamentally a better fit? How did you help them make a good choice but without manipulating them?

Thanks,

Polly