We had swim classes for ds7 when he was just 18 months and then again at 3. I don't know if they helped or not. He went through a phase of being scared to put his face in the water between 3 and 4. By 5 he was over it and could go underwater. His swimming skills at this point are very basic. I had lessons at the 'Y' wen I was 6 and 7 and am a ok swimmer. I think lessons can be very efficient.
My ds7 decided he does not want formal lessons this summer so we are taking the slow road -- "Mommy and Daddy lessons" I think trust is a big issue for him since he had a camp counselor force him to a pool when he wasn't ready (at 4). I think it helps him to feel more secure because we jointly decide on what to learn and how.
like homeschooling/unschooling swimming we take a very relaxed, chil-led approach. I hope this will be the summer when everything clicks and he gets really good at it. It will give me peace of mind and he will have more fun.
Ametrine - How much time does your ds get to spend in a pool without lessons being involved?
In any case, it sounds like you have made a lot of progress even since the very first lesson! Take heart. As the other posts have said, sometimes it just takes a while.
Good luck
