"'Ello. My name is I-won't-stop Mom. You failed my son. Prepare to die."

OK - maybe a little extreme. How about: "Prepare to suffer way more lost time in meetings than you would ever have lost just spending a little bit of time trying in good faith to give my child what he needs."

Sue (who thinks Princess Bride = best movie ever).
P.S. You see that I didn't even demand success. I'm only asking for good faith effort.