Exactly-- and know when you think your personal point of 'intervention' is, and what your larger, overarching goals actually are. Think about the developmental arc carefully-- and know what "outside resources" look like for you personally.
Also know that in the case of HG+ kiddos, that picture can get a lot more complex in a hurry. You may be mostly on your own.
This is why I posted that particular thread from Mothering-- much of the discussion was
very thoughtful-- and it came from people who have considerable experience with unschooling.
This is another very thoughtful and respectful
general thread about whether or not this kind of educational philosophy is a good fit-- and what it looks like for parents who consider that fit issue carefully.
Secular Homeschooling: I have realized something...The opening post is SO thoughtful and summarizes the crux of the matter very very well, IMO:
Recently, I've been doing some research about high school because I have to make some decisions in the next year. I have been quizzing as many local families as I can about what their teenagers are doing, what worked, what they used, etc...
I happen to know a lot of unschooly families, and you know what I figured out? In order to truly embrace unschooling, you have to be 100% okay with virtually ANY outcome. If your kid starts his own business at 17, that's awesome! If they work part-time at a snowboard shop at 19, that's awesome, too! If they do nothing in particular until they're 18 and then decide they want to become engineers, that's cool! If they realize they have have absolutely no math courses done, and now they have to spend two years doing that, well that's no problem. To the committed unschoolers, any path the kids choose to take is just fine because they are on their own journey and they will figure out what they need as they go along and be motivated to learn it then.
Listening to all the stories has made me realize that I am NOT OKAY with some of these potential outcomes. It is NOT COOL (to me) if you're 16 and can't write a paragraph. It is NOT OKAY (with me) to be starting grade 10 math when you're 17.
I've always been mainly supportive of unschooling. I can see how it works for many families, and many people would probably describe my style as fairly "unschooly." However, I have suddenly and dramatically realized that I have definite expectations of my kids. In a nutshell, they need to be in a position to enter a post-secondary program at approximately age 18. If they decide not to go because they would rather travel or volunteer or start a business, that's fine by me. No problem. However, there is no way that they will be UNABLE to attend because they have to go back and get basic stuff done.
Phew. Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. I suppose I'd better let the kids know what's expected, eh?
Here is how I see that realization be particularly critical for those of us raising HG+ youngsters-- we're already trying to help sail fairly difficult-to-captain vessels, as it were, due to the peculiar needs, asynchronous quirks, and abilities of our HG+ kids. Their potential, however, means that we have perhaps got more reason than
most parents to be wary of being "okay" with some outcomes.
Is it TRULY okay if a PG child never gets a high school diploma or any college education?
For some parents, I guess the answer is "sure, if that's what s/he wants," but for me, I'd be worried that I'd
inadvertently allowed some doors to be CLOSED to that child as a result of MY choices
for the education of that child.
That would bother me. As soon as I could see that being a real possibility (that gaps were going to widen irretrievably into chasms that my daughter, with her personality, was going to simply cry and walk away from)... I realized that prudence for us was going to dictate using whatever means necessary to get her to tolerate instruction-- and even direction-- from others.
I don't actually view unschooling as negative, though. Just... not
always right for all children, at all ages, or for all families.
