Thank you, Old Dad. Your words are wise.
I don't think I made myself clear. My problem with a parent asking a child in front of the teacher if they did what the teacher is accusing them of is because I think it's disrespectful of the teacher's authority in the child's eyes. Of course a parent shouldn't just take the word of the teacher, but should ask the child (in private) for their account of the incident in question. But to do so in front of the teacher using, "Did you do that?" type sentences isn't the way to go about it, imo. I would want to ask the teacher for some privacy with my child to speak with them before continuing with the conference.
Of course we all have our different manner of going about things and we're all entitled to them. If my child is accused in front of the teacher and I, then I feel it appropriate for my child to respond in front of the teacher and I. If the teacher sends me a personal e-mail / phone call, then I'll question my child in private.
