Originally Posted by kcab
But - my personal experience was not good, starting in pre-k. Which is why I wanted to make two points:

1) not all kids let parents know how miserable they are

and

2) kids can come to the conclusion that you, the parent, are unable to change the situation.

Once they reach that conclusion they may be less likely to share information. If it's not going to be acted on, sharing their pain may only amount to loss of face for the child. At least, this is sort of how I saw it at times, as a kid.

Good points. My son had 2 fun preK years at a play-based preK. It has lots of animals, including horses, lots of outdoor play etc and DS enjoyed it. He had a horrible K year. The teacher didn't know the meaning of the word "differentiation." I was informed at Nov PT conference that he was ready for 1st grade. It was downhill from there. DS would cry most evenings in bed about school. He was withdrawn when he came home. We somehow made it through the year. It took a month into the summer to get my boy back, one who loved to learn. So, in September, for meet the teacher day, I told DS to be sure to tell me how he is feeling about school this year. His response? "Why? I did that last year and you couldn't do anything about it. Nothing changed." I could have cried. My son was learning that there is things in life that not even his parents have control over.

First grade was better. His teacher had a BS in science and had science stuff in the room. SHe did alot of projects in the class. They played alot of math games so while he didn't learn many new math concepts, the games were fun and reinforcing. The last 2months of school were hard. Since the advanced kids had been grouped with this teacher and they were done w/ everything for the year, I think the learning came to a halt and with it, DS's complaints increased.

In our school system, kids changed schools for grades 2-5. DS didn't get the teacher which from what I was told differentiates well. He got a teacher who is in her 3rd year. She is nice, has tried some things with DS (independent project w/ another science-talented kid; a battery kit to explore in class instead of math time and reading time; a few challenge math problems here and there) but he's been unhappy. For months, maybe 5 months, he has a stomach ache every morning or a headache or dizziness. He says "Why do I have to go to school if I don't learn anything? I waste my whole day at school." He constantly complains of never having enough time for things b/c he it at school for so long. He complains about not being able to do history with me b/c there just is no time. Plus, he lollygags w/ homework so that eats time as well. Homework has been a constant battle.

People and the psych tell me to enrich at home. Well, he is already enriched at home but now after being gone all day, he just wants to play when he's home.

With my son, he's not like most of the kids here, he's not light years ahead of his peers. When I looked at the Everyday math book, I thought if he could start in the last fourth of the book, he'd have been ok with it. But he's a thinker. It's my feeling that school is boring, partly b/c of things he already knows, but b/c of the lack of stimulating material. I don't think I'm explaining myself well.

I recounted a couple of conversations between my son and I to a teacher friend. She commented that if he's able to discuss books on that level, no wonder he's bored in class. He won't get that level of book or discussion at school.

WHile my son was advanced in math early - not to the extent of kids here - but quite advanced compared to his local peers, I've notice his love of math, playing with numbers, figuring things out on his own eroding. I don't know if it's the teacher or the curriculum (Everyday Math) or both. In several months, his 5yr old brother will probably be at the same level in math when initially DS was 2yrs ahead. He's been kept in a holding pattern I feel. I recently found out from DS that they are not practicing math facts. His mental math skills have completely eroded. I did Rightstart math with him his summer after K after the suggestion of a teacher friend. In K, he learned that math was boring and that he wasn't good at it. How could he conclude that he wasn't good at it when he was so far ahead of his peers? Well, he couldn't figure out things on his own so he felt he wasn't good at math. He blossomed with us doing math regularly at home. But during the school year, it's tough to keep it up especially after the baby was born last year. I had laid such a wonderful foundation for critical thinking and mental manipulation of numbers - and it seems it's all POOF. He needs reinforcement but to also be constantly moving forward.

I've talked to the teacher. SHe tells me that DS is so happy when he's at school. He comes in all smiles. DS loves the interaction with his friends so I"m sure he loves that part. He's been a bit happier recently b/c alot of things are going on at the school - non academic things. But it's hard to get him going in the morning. But when he was on vacation w/ his grandparents, they reported he jumped out bed, got dressed, got ready and came down ready to start the day. He also did not have one stomach ache or headache or dizziness and he also slept well.

I don't know..well, it's 2am, the baby woke me up and then once I started thinking about all this, I was too stressed to sleep...hence my long winded post....I'll probably delete most of it in the morning. I guess I'll try to sleep now......