"Yes, his previously bad preschool behavior was directly correlated to lack of challenge"
How do you know that they were correlated?
We suspected the same type of problem with our son, who was 4 at the time. He attended a Montessori program at 3, and returned to the same classroom at 4. The first year was fantastic. He went usually 3 days a week and loved it. But the second year was not good at all. Every time I picked him up he seemed depressed, sad, frustrated. I could never put my finger on it for a few months, but I could clearly see it was related to school. My main concern was that he had lost his little "spark" and no longer seemed interested in learning. I would ask leading questions which required some sort of explanation or detailed answers, which he would answer quite well for a 4 year old. Still couldn't figure it out. Then we had a fall conference with the teacher. She basically told us he was a huge behavior problem, was the "class clown," was "completely unproductive" and was a "borderline significant problem."
We were STUNNED. Our child has been very easy to parent until this point. He is happy, confident, friendly, easy-going, and very flexible. We have never had behavior issues, and we did not see ANY of this at home. Furthermore, the teacher went on to imply that he was autistic or had some other developmental issues.
We withdrew him as soon as we could, a few weeks later. After what I would call a period to unwind, he finally returned to himself. We decided to gently ease into homeschooling, and signed him up for a local mother's day out program two half-days a week for some old-fashioned play time. It was a great combination. His little spark returned, and now he is the happy child I once knew.
In the midst of our struggles, we decided to pursue formal testing. It was then that we discovered that our "bright" four year old was functioning at the level of an eight year old in regards to IQ (SB5). After meeting with a psychologist several times and pursuing other achievement testing, as well, we realized he was probably completely bored in a classroom that he was in last year, even though he should have been exposed to more "advanced" subject matter. He likely mastered everything available to him last year as the youngest in a 3/4/5 class and was simply ready to move on.
It was a huge wake-up call for us. Although it was a rough couple of months, we are grateful for the experience. We knew he was an intelligent child, but we did not just how far ahead of the curve he really is.
It was very clear to us that his behaviors were directly correlated with boredom and a complete lack of challenge in his school environment.
Now we are doing well and looking forward to homeschooling, which is the only option we can see that is appropriate for our area. There is not a school around that will allow him to skip kinder/first grade to jump into second or third, which is where he would be more appropriately placed. We gave up the battle and decided to homeschool instead.
Good luck to you. I know it's tough. We've been there and it was a very stressful time.
Just keep listening to that mother's intution.
I'm learning more and more to trust my own.
Warm regards,
Allison
