YES on including social aspects in the IEP. These can be taught as rote skills, but have to be generalized across her day. She might need a classroom teacher who understands the needs and can give her clues, as well as 1:1 training on the skills from a special ed teacher or an outside professional who can coordinate with the school staff.
To consider: would letting peers know about her challenges make it better? In our experience peers really stepped up to understanding DS when they were given frank information about his dx and how it affects him. Our classroom teacher in 3rd did a little presentation and it made a huge difference in social acceptance of DS. Kids are at their most compassionate when they can understand and identify with what's going on with a peer who seems "different."
If all the kids could be taught to come to your DD and tell her their names at the start of every conversation, then invite her to play, for instance, would that work? The special ed teacher or counselor can also build a circle of friends program (
http://circleofriends.org/ or similar) with kind children who agree to be understanding... Just throwing out ideas here, don't know what will work.
DeeDee
