Thanks, Grinity. We're on it. There is no question in my mind that this is unacceptable. This is 4th grade, and the teacher hasn't observed it herself. While understanding, it's tough to fix in April if the teacher has failed to establish an atmosphere of mutual respect.
The teacher and I are now in daily contact, and the vice principal and school councilor have also been brought int.
As for educational setting, we're pretty stuck -- DD needs to go on an IEP, which should happen soon. These are new diagnoses, and the social part of the diagnoses will be part of the IEP.
