Given their reaction to previous attempts at presenting information, I can't envision them taking any "hints."
Your putting considerable effort into second-guessing people who haven't acted terribly rational thus far, which is why I circle around to my suggestion for the more direct approach.
"I'm seeing X, Y & Z with my daughter, just like with my son... when can we move forward with a similar plan for her?"
Thanks Dandy, I'm really trying to be careful to work on the school relationship. I'm going to try your approach.
