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He will ask them for their toys by verbalizing and signing and of course they do not understand him. It goes something like this: Ball? Please? This ball please? Blue ball? Please? This! Thiiiiis! Waaaaaaaah!!!!! ~cue meltdown~

Should I be looking for 3 or 4 yo children for play dates? Physically he is like a normal 16 month old so he cannot keep up with the older kids. He is really frustrated. I don't know how to help him.
A few ideas -

Kids may be involved in parallel play at this stage, not usually interacting with each other. Would it help for you to be actively involved by repeating your child's requests (so he knows he is heard and understood) and communicating to the other toddlers or their moms on his behalf, and facilitating the sharing of the toys? Or might the other moms/toddlers be interested in learning signing?

Do any of the same-age peers have older siblings who are 3-4 years old and familiar with younger kids (your son's age)?

It is not too early to begin looking for other outliers. Some ideas are:
- local independent gifted schools
- SENG: local SENG-model parent groups
- NAGC: local state affiliate
- Mensa: local chapters
- Local testers of the gifted (Hoagies list of testers may be a good starting point)

You may also wish to begin a portfolio for eventual application to the Davidson Young Scholars (DYS) program when your child turns 5.

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Problem #2: We are blowing through toys... Any toy suggestions?
Many parents purchase toys second-hand through consignment shops, garage sales, or thrift stores. If you do this, be sure to wash toys well, a mild bleach solution is often recommended. There are some toy rental services, one which was launched on the TV show Shark Tank has since filed for bankruptcy, presumably due to competition in the toy rental service niche.

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Problem #3: Others Mommies give me death stares... I am not doing anything to my son to make him this way.
If your child remains noticeably ahead of chronological age peers, this may exacerbate throughout the school years. You may wish to begin searching now for a school placement with gifted kids, or plan now for homeschooling. The Davidson Database has several excellent articles on school selection, including this article titled Finding a school that fits. Gifted Homeschoolers Forum (GHF) may be a good starting point for exploring homeschooling a precocious toddler. Some parents also enjoy the Mensa For Kids website.