Definitely, step 1 is knowing your rights and not taking no for an answer. I don't recall the specific diagnoses, but there should at least be a full eval.
We have had great success with a paid advocate, who helped us navigate the stonewalling.
It does happen that a 2E child sometimes needs their strengths accommodated in order to work on their weaknesses. This, like the disability, can be an educational need.
A child who fights tooth and nail and won't behave at school is, perversely, an easier child to advocate for in certain ways, because sooner or later they'll realize that the situation needs to work. But getting the school to ID the disability is very important-- in part because it protects against punishments for disability-related behaviors.
