Ummm....ok...and you're a psychologist, since when? It just annoyed me, and it annoyed his wife.
I find it annoying and offensive not because I feel there is something wrong with having Aspergers but I really take issues with people who put themselves in the position of authority and power to assign labels to others when no one asked for their unprofessional opinion. It's really obnoxious.
On the one hand: yes, armchair psychology can be very rude and unhelpful.
On the other hand: this sort of thing is a side effect of a tremendous effort to make "invisible" disabilities more normal and part of the landscape. In the 1960s they were still using electric shocks to punish kids with autism and institutionalizing them, keeping them away from their families. We are now at a point where a substantial part of the population is aware that autism exists. That has to be a good thing.
One side effect is that "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing"-- that, knowing a bit, people try to deploy that knowledge. It's also too bad that the popular press gets it wrong, relying on anecdata or stereotypes so much of the time.
I do think most who bring up possible diagnoses are trying to be helpful and/or sympathetic, in the mode of "I see a challenge, let me offer ideas about it." Doesn't mean you have to take them seriously, of course. I usually thank them for their ideas and change the subject, or (in some cases) take the opportunity to educate them about what's really going on.
