I appreciate all of the feedback and advice. I should clarify one thing. I'm not worried at all about her being unable to get a driver's license while her friends can. I was contrasting her concern (wanting not to grow up too fast) with the apparently common concern that kids will want to grow up as fast as their classmates when accelerated.
She just turned 9, while most 4th graders here are 9 to 10.
For those commenting about there possibly being more options when she is ready for high school, I agree completely that it isn't something we need to worry about yet. It's not something we have discussed except in trying to decide whether she should be at the charter school or at a regular school. She is now in her fourth school (for fourth grade), so it has been a challenge finding somewhere that she has felt comfortable. She was utterly miserable in kindergarten, but we were only able to get a grade skip by changing schools. She seems happy at the charter school and wants to stay there even if it makes her options for high school more difficult.
I know a great deal about the high school options for a variety of professional reasons. I work as a college professor. Probably my profession affects my view of high school education. There are some wonderful high school teachers available; I've done professional development for them. I just don't think there is a good academic option that would fit in with her charter school work unless we can greatly increase the breadth to lower the speed. Socially, who knows... She might love it. We'll have to see.
She does seem to get along equally well with boys and girls; she loves girly dresses, but also loves digging rocks in quarries and mines, computer geekiness, etc. One real advantage of feeling like she doesn't fit in anyway is that she doesn't seem to feel much peer pressure. She was assigned to give a presentation on, "Why we should eat turkey at Thanksgiving." Her report was titled, "Why we should eat Tofurky instead at Thankgiving." I'd be astounded if there were a single other vegetarian in her school and thought she'd never live that down (it was hard not to discourage her out of fear of teasing), but the other kids just accepted it without comment.
I could imagine wanting to spend 20 years at college to explore all of the different options. I never liked the social aspects of college, but I loved the classes in every subject.
She worries about all sorts of responsibilities, all of which she doesn't need to worry about yet. She worries about what sort of work to do, whether she will want to get a house, not wanting to drive, etc. She worries about the world, especially global warming. She worries about mortality and the meaning of life. So pretty much everything.
By the way, Squishys, I wish I had thought of that siggie first... It's a great choice.
