Yes, definitely the IEP = good thing for this!
Our DS would have been expelled or at least suspended over and over again if it weren't for his IEP for Asperger's. He had behavioral outbursts exactly as you describe (at least one for each of those same reasons, plus some) and would lash out at the other kids, sometimes hitting, sometimes yelling inappropriate things or threatening them. The school was fabulous for all the social skills training they gave him, and by this year we let the IEP go (with the understanding that we can put it back if needed) because he is behaving so well these days. But in the years when he racked up six pink slips, he'd have been gone if not for the IEP that protected him from suspension or expulsion.
As said above, they can't be forced to medicate him, and the IEP should contain what everyone agrees upon -- social skills training being paramount.
