Hello everyone,
I did write and post an answer a couple of days ago, but now I wonder if I posted it.
anyway.
First of all I want to thank all of you for your answers and advices toward my "over-dramatic" statement/topic !
I was a little bit moved when I wrote this thread.
Now that I am calmer, I feel like my psychologist was right about my arty shenanigans" I do am a musician but I no longer wants to be a professional musician, since most of the musicians I've been playing are not in a democratic mood, they always tell me what to do and not to do. It made this passion I had no longer pleasing at all. It would not be such a big deal if I was a leader but I'm definitely not. I mostly play the drums and the bass, so I'm a little doomed here !
I taught and still am, to myself about acoustics, sound design and audio mixing, and it makes me so happy I am jabbering all day long about these subjects. It even made start doing physics again.
My psychologist once told me she could hear the knowledge and the happiness when I was explaining what I was doing and that there must be something to work on. I never thought about it until today.
I have always been working to get what I have. But these days I gave up and did not even noticed it before. I've been seriously whining, like: "how, I miss my brains" of course you do silly-rabbit, it's not easy doing nothing.
For the record: I am currently unemployed because of my health, and the treatments they give me at the hospital, are hard to deal with sometimes. But now that my organism is a little more used to it I have more energy to complain and be fed up with the situation. (what I unfortunately did)I don't know if any of you or perhaps your kids ever felt like they were never doing something good no matter what. But I hope I'd be able to get rid of this non-healthy thinking.
Thank you again, and my bad I drifted away from the subject. Rendez-vous to the brag topic if I am achieving something someday
