Thanks for all the responses. I wouldn't qualify the teacher's behavior as "hateful" - ignorant, unsupportive, inappropriate absolutely. I have made my displeasure known to the district and have a Dept of Ed complaint drafted but haven't sent it in yet.
I am very concerned about future teacher placements and that would be a major consideration in deciding whether or not to pursue out of district placement. We requested placement in a different school in our district this summer but did not get it. Our options would really come down to the 2E school that would require DD and I to stay in New York Monday-Friday and come home on weekends, a well respected LD school a 45 minute drive away or the wonderful private we had wanted to enroll DD at before discovering all her LD issues. All would be complicated solutions, and all probably unnecessary if we had a supportive principal and teacher. Unless there are some major personnel changes, though, I don't see that happening.
To be clear I am not in any way concerned about college prep right now - we have our hands full with second grade. DD has a great spec ed teacher but I hear through the rumor mill that she is planning to retire at the end of the year. I really feel like I have done all I can to make this school situation work - we need to get the AT piece put together and then we can make some informed decisions about which direction to go. As I said in earlier posts there is really nothing more I can ask the district to do in terms of providing services. We finally have people at the district level who get it but that doesn't necessarily translate to her daily school experience. I don't know what kind of battle we would be looking at if we asked for OOD placement. They would probably be most receptive to the LD school but that is lowest on my list of preferences.
Yes this has indeed been extreme. It makes it really hard to even imagine the light at the end of the tunnel.
{big sigh}
