As am I. The point is that you establish your credentials with the small stuff, and then they'll listen to you when it really matters.
See, I don't sweat the small stuff. I let them go nuts with ideas, directions, and crazy inventions. When they coated the bathroom, top to bottom, with conditioner when they were 4 & 5, to see if they could make a frictionless surface because we'd watched a show about maglev trains and they were fascinated by it, I didn't get mad, and they didn't get punished. Small stuff in terms of "wrongitude", but big in terms of creative thinking.
They shot out the door or disappeared under a rack of clothing in a store-major, major punishment. Copious sweating.
Look, there are times to be nice, soft, goofy, loving, sweet and permissive. Keeping your kid safe is not one of those times, in my opinion.
That's a flip response. Your world may have more shades of gray in it than mine, it doesn't make my world "false".
Look, they're 12 and 13 now, and except for still making incredible messes when they come up with ideas, they have a fairly good sense of what's right and wrong, and what's a reasonable risk. They've learned that a rational argument will get them much closer to what they want rather than temper tantrums.
They've learned that impulsive behavior is a non-starter, and to think before they act. Well, most of the time-we all knee jerk with stuff occasionally, but just having the awareness that "oops, should have thought that one through" is really valuable.
I'm trying to get them to adulthood with an ability to function in society, be able to accurately anticipate consequences, and make the best of a sometimes crappy situation. Those are good skills to learn, and I think the sooner, the better.
Those skills are just really
no fun to teach, though.
