I'm joining the discussion very late, but I just wanted to say that it makes me sad to hear such negative words thrown around about babies. Words like moody, mean, manipulative, demanding, etc. It seems inappropriate to me to pigeon hole and predict a person's life long personality based on their behavior as an infant.
I don't use/view the word manipulative as negative at all.
I do think it takes a certain amount of mental ability for an infant to communicate his/her wants nonverbally.
Yeah. I also want to say that I don't feel I am labeling DD and acting like she will be "moody" or whatever for her entire life. I believe she is extremely frustrated with her inability to do some things (ex: last night she tried over and over again to turn the pages of a regular big book. She couldn't do it. She balled up her fists and made her customary frustrated / exasperated growly sound that I can barely describe lol.)
Anyway, I don't like anyone to label her in a negative way. My mom did it with my sister and I, and I've even brought my mom around to avoiding the negative words.
We try to use words like "persistent, independent, curious, etc." Other people have said my baby "has a temper" and is "aggressive." I don't like it, though DD does appear like that to other people at times.
I know that many of the characteristics that drive parents nuts are some of the exact same ones that people admire in successful, happy adults.
We were referring to her as "Grouchy McGroucherson" at a few months old because she cried so much back then (truly, we had to joke or we would cry ourselves), and a few times people commented on how good she was out in public and I automatically said something about how I was just praying she would stay asleep/happy or whatever. I was mad at myself for saying it and DH and I decided to get the negative stuff out of our every day vocabulary ever since.
