First, I share no5no5's wondering whether it's actually arithmetic your DD hates, or what. Nobody could possibly actually hate maths so there must be some mistake here :-) Maybe separate this issue out from the timetabling issue and start a new thread about how she feels about maths and what she's been exposed to?
About the timetabling: I'm trying to understand what the root issues are here. It sounds as though the main thing that's not working is that her choice of schedule leads to you having to be "on" and fully engaged with her for too much of the day, is that right? And maybe also there's the meta-issue that you feel she is manipulating and controlling the rest of the family more than should be accepted, but aren't sure how to stop this? I haven't heard that you feel she isn't learning enough anyway, is that right? So if you changed your system to address the first two concerns, and there was a period during which she learned less as she got used to the new system, that wouldn't be a disaster?
I think if I were you I might concentrate on separating my responsibilities from hers. E.g. it's her responsibility to do enough work to keep learning in all areas, on average over some length of time. It's your responsibility to (a) make resources such as your own attention available to her enough that it's possible for her to do the work she needs to do (b) ultimately, make sure that she is learning. It isn't your responsibility to be available to her in exactly the way and at exactly the moments she chooses. And you're the adult: in the end, if she isn't willing and able to do her part in homeschooling, you have the option of putting her in school, and there'd be no harm in her knowing that homeschooling is only what happens if it works for everyone.
I think I'd have a Serious Talk about responsibilities, and then make some limited commitment to be available, e.g., between 9 and 2 provided you aren't busy doing something else. If she wants to do some of her work outside those hours, that's fine, but then you won't be available to sit with her. Maybe she might like to plan it so that the things she most wants help with she does first, while you're available. Then the next morning she can show you what she did while you were "not at school", and you can discuss it. (You might find it easier to set expectations in terms of outputs, rather than inputs - rather than saying she has to work for 2 hours, tell her she has to produce an amount and quality of work that you think is equivalent. Then you don't have to track what minutes she's working, you just look at the product.)
An issue that comes down to your philosophy is what you do if she does nothing when you're available, and then nothing later because you're not available, and ends up doing no school work for an extended period. Personally in that case I would say that obviously my child wasn't responsible enough to plan his own timetable, I'd enforce work at particular times, by whatever means necessary (for a start, by being extremely boring, offering neither fun nor help with schoolwork, after 2pm on any day when schoolwork hadn't been done before then) and if I found myself unable to enforce it I'd declare homeschooling a failure for now, but YMMV.
