Originally Posted by no5no5
If what you feel for people who have been involved in despicable events is contempt or hatred, IMO either your reaction is not rational, or you have not fully understood the sociological and psychological circumstances involved. The rational reaction to a despicable event, once it is understood, is to feel pity or sorrow for the people involved. Now, I'm not saying that one must always act rationally; but you seem to be saying that those who do not act rationally ought to be despised.

I believe that the feeling of contempt--that sense that others are less than oneself and ought to be despised--is the very emotion that is behind much (nearly all?) of the world's problems...including genocide.

I feel pity and sorrow when I consider the circumstances of some who have been forced into it, and I recognize many of the dynamics - consider, for example, the Nuremberg trials and the 'my boss told me to do it or I'd have been killed/sacked/courtmartialed' issue; while it's not an excuse to do something like that, one can see why one might do it - but ultimately, how hard is it, I wonder, for people to have sufficient presence of mind in a situation to realize '... this is wrong, I'm going to find a way to not do it'? Many have managed to do so throughout history. It's not impossible.

Originally Posted by GeoMamma
Oh look, as a student myself, I have to agree with you about the vast majority of students. Not because they aren't as smart as me - I don't know if they are or aren't - but because they don't care! They are not there to learn about something they find interesting, they are there to earn a grade doing the bare minimum they can get by with so they can go to the tavern and get drunk. frown Yes, it's frustrating. No, I don't socialize with them often. Why would I? I have nothing in common with them. I don't bear any ill-will to them, except that they do make my life in the classroom boring and a lot less engaging than it would otherwise be. I just had to vent that too. I come home and rant to my DH and get it out of my system. You have to let it go, if for no other reason than hanging onto it makes you feel bad wink

What has been my saving grace has been two-fold. 1) enjoying the company of some commonalities when they occur and 2) Having one person I do feel really comfortable with. I am lucky to have that.

Another thing is that I have gotten a lot better at chasing people I can see any possibility of that connection. Sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't.

It sounds like you are dealing with a lot right now, ACh. I hope it gets better for you. I think the age you are at is a tricky one too. I don't mean that in a condescending way, so I hope you are not insulted, I just mean that it is a exciting but incredibly difficult time for many people as they go through it, and more so as a gifted person. I'm kind of glad to be - ahem - well through it wink

Sending hugs

ETA: Ok, I KNOW my statement about most students is a complete exaggeration and in a more charitable mood I wouldn't say 'tavern' I would probably say they are busy working or something like that because I know that a lot of them probably are. But I also understand the sheer frustration of sitting in a class while the lecturer explains for the third time something those students should have learned three years ago. It does lead one to exaggerations. smile

I also wanted to add a specific survival strategy for that situation. Doodling. Honestly some of my lecture notes were almost unreadable for all the fantastic artwork surrounding them. Saved my sanity many times smile


Don't worry, I'm not insulted about the comment about my age. It is difficult at times, especially when I and most of the people I know aren't yet at that magical age of 25-27 when the frontal lobe hasn't quite disconnected itself sufficiently from the amygdala and matured fully (it's the last part of the brain to mature - that's part of why, for example, insurance companies jack up premiums on people until they're 25 ). And I'm young and frankly have had bad experiences so far with living away, for one (tried it twice, and now part of me is terrified to do it again, despite the fact that I want to and intend to do so for graduate school and for that time when I move out of the house and on my own - and I'm sure this is not uncommon).

lucounu, I've actually gotten a good deal of reassurance and information from this thread. Perhaps you could give me some information on one thing: When I talk about a topic that is very emotionally 'triggering', one might say, I have a very, very hard time articulating my point accurately - it feels as if there are no words in English to make my point, even if someone later makes the same point in a better way than I could think of. What advice do you have about this?