Your daughter sounds very much like a younger version of DD. She was in daycare for a couple of months this summer (she's now with a babysitter part time but will be back in daycare next month). We've stopped counting the number of words but at daycare she barely speaks! Granted, it is in a new language for her but there are some there that understand English but she still doesn't speak much to them. She's going through a shy phase (started right when daycare started) and now doesn't talk much when strangers are around.
She's always had some pretty severe separation anxiety (got it at 4.5 months, ugh!). And it really hasn't gotten any better. I keep wondering when it will???? Maybe by the time she's in college? Hopefully?
Anyways, what did help was that she formed a bond with two workers at her daycare (ironically, the two who spoke English fairly well). She also started making some friends (most of them older). Basically, the daycare workers would make sure she was always around one of the workers that she liked the best and things went smoother. We also made sure that she was at an activity that she really enjoyed when we left in the morning (normally the trampoline).
Good luck and I can really understand your frustration!
ETA: we also have the sensitivity thing going too. She really freaks out when she hears other kids crying and we have to discuss it afterwards. It helps if I ask her why she thinks the baby was crying. Normally she says the baby has to go to the potty.
Although she's STILL talking about a baby that was crying that she saw a few days ago, she's especially concerned about him!
Oh, and we also go the different comments. Mostly because she is insanely curious so while all the kids are playing with the toys she's checking out the file cabinets and every inch of the room!
