This is a very interesting thread for me. I'm also dealing with an emotionally intense toddler having trouble with preschool.
She understands that "Mama always comes back" -- instead, her problem is that the situation is too overstimulating and overwhelming. Unfortunately, the teachers' strategies for dealing with her upsets are exactly the wrong things to do! The first one is pressuring her to engage in more activities. It's all the activities that are stressing her out! The other one is reading her that dreadful "Owl Babies" story. It does not make her feel better, it just makes her more upset on behalf of the little owls!
Fortunately, the teachers are very responsive and are working closely with me on this. I'm working on explaining Hanni to them, and for my part I'm reminding myself that most kids are not like her, and the teachers' strategies are probably very effective for most kids.
I'm really hoping this all smoothes out and I can keep her in the program. If I have to pull her out, I'm back to one-on-one babysitting, which is too little social stimulation for her. Sigh.
