Dear Jeremy,
I am so sad for what happened to you. Your story really touched me. I think it's precisely why the parents of these super-bright kids (on these bulletin boards) are somewhat obsessive in trying to figure out what will work for them...I come in contact with so many parents who purse their lips when I tell them I've skipped my kids, and who boast that they've held theirs back to "savor" their childhoods. The headmaster of one school vehemently lectured me about "why can't we let them be kids as long as we can". He told me that while his son had the ability to do math several grade levels above his own grade, but he wouldn't let him ("Absolutely not!"). Consequently, I changed schools for my youngest. Some parents hold their kids back so they can be more mature, or physically bigger to help them excel in sports. I try not to judge these decisions because I don't want them to judge my decision to let my kids go as far as they can.
I am scared about making these important decisions affecting the lives of four little boys, and I hope I'm doing what's best. We all know it'll come back to blaming Mom for whatever troubles they experience. But your story leads me to believe that it's better than doing nothing or thwarting advancement.
Personally, I blamed my parents for a lot of emotional distress I suffered as a child, teenager, and even into my 20's. My advice to you, however, is to try hard to move on--beyond blame, which I think held me back. Good luck!
