I'm currently trying to piece out why one of my DC finds it very easy to express his wealth of knowledge or share random observations out of the blue, but has difficulty in expressing opinion. I hear a lot of "I don't know," and it's not always a cop-out -- he will say he really doesn't know. It's almost a freeze at times. Anything from "do you like this shirt?" while shopping, to "do you want to try this activity?" to "what do you think this might mean?" when reading together.
Some of it is anxiety -- he will say he doesn't know when he's actually unsure of what to expect and not sure if he would like it, but kind of actually wants to, like about inviting a friend over (where I don't know means "maybe but I'm nervous."). Is the opinion aspect anxiety over not knowing what the correct answer is supposed to be?
But something I read here recently made me realize the way I phrase the question just doesn't always work for him. I changed my question to "would you wear this shirt if you woke up one day and saw it in your dresser?" and he said "yeah."
If he actually has a strong opinion, he will share that honestly. And it's good to be adaptable -- like if you actually don't care where to go eat that night, it's great to say "I'm flexible, what do you have in mind?" and go with it.
How do I teach him how to reach and share an opinion when he's unsure and can't think it through? I think it gets more important as he gets older and is expected to engage, lead, and debate with peers. Is it just part of growing up, or is there a piece of the puzzle missing?
