It's an arms race. When most top kids took 1-2 AP classes, those who really wanted to stand out would take 3-4. When most top kids take 10 AP classes these days, those who really wanted to stand out will need to take 15. When most top kids take 15 APs, those who want to stand out will take 20, invent something, play multiple instruments, win some national competitions, be the captain of the varsity team, build schools in Africa...
And no matter how much kids (and parents) stretch themselves, the top universities accept a fixed number of students.
The real question is how big a difference in career, earning and life one can make by having the name of a prestigious college on one's resume.
-- and, not to belabor the obvious, here, but in addition to
that big question is the other one:
does that difference matter in a positive way to the child being thus... um... processed? What I mean is-- is this difference still on the positive side of the balance sheet, when it's all said and done? If you have to sacrifice a meaningful childhood and developmental arc to do it, is it still worth it?
Honestly, this isn't even about
a prestigious college on one's resume. It's about having One's
Top Only Choice of prestigious colleges on it.
This is where "Oh, the horrors-- no, sadly, he went to
Brown ... but Shhhhhh, no need to humiliate him..." comes into things.
This
is that crazy, people. It just is. I realize that we as parents may have dreams of limitless futures for our kids, in which they get to do exactly as we please, as broad as our imaginations for them--
but they get to dream their
own dreams. Or they used to, anyway. Which is probably where academic all-star suicide rates come into things, but that is another thread, isn't it?
