Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy G support negative towards PG differentiated path

My husband and I were delightfully overwhelmed when our son was RIAS tested with a composite score of 150, Verbal 119, Non-Verbal >165. The psychologist wanted to point out to me how unusual our son was, saying that he was clearly not approaching his limit on Non-Verbal and that he was so fast that she thought he was guessing, until she realized he was correct each time. Anyway, I only make these points because I'm trying to explain how I see a future stretching out in front of him that could be really fantastic or really painful, depending on the environment.

He just turned 5 last week, which still pains me to think of my baby growing up so fast. But I digress. He's spectacular - well adjusted, loving, curious, cautious, and as far as I can tell sprinkled with fairy dust. Sure, I may be biased, but what Mama isn't?

He's been thriving in a Montessori environment from the age of 2, where he started 2 days a week. The student population at this school appears to be 95% G, with a smattering of PG, according to the staff. School is two year olds through 5th grade, with a total of something like 4 kids in grades 3-5. The majority of students are in the 2s class and 3-6 year old class.

One downside I see is that he hasn't mastered his letters yet, while most of his peers are reading. I have been remiss in not going over basic school work, but have already started correcting this oversight myself. He has very little natural interest in reading and prefers to be read to. We read for 30-45 minutes every night and he loves this special time.

His vocabulary is lacking compared to his peers in school, and is not terribly verbose in general. He's been a serious, introspective thinker from birth. On that note, I didn't speak until after I was 2, and my husband and I both completely left brained engineering types, so he doesn't hear tons of dialog at home that other children would - day to day chatter is just nominal in our household.

I talked with one gifted specialist at a perspective new school who predicted that if retested post-reading, his verbal score will shoot up. It would only raise the stakes for us as parents, as far as I can tell. I doubt this will happen, as his parents also lack strength and skill in Verbal.

So, background established, enter present challenge. I've been reading about the DYS program, learning about the Davidson Academy, exploring educational options here in St Petersburg, FL, USA and have been slapped with some fairly surprising responses from what has been my support network thus far for my son. Educators at the current school seem to think PG is not a big deal, and that what is most important is to do what I think is best for him, no matter what his score may be. They say that the path I picked out prior to testing is the path to take. That sounds great, except that I'm not terribly educated on what to do with a PG kid. I picked out a great path for a G kid.

Extended family has adamantly stated that there is no way they would support our family moving to Reno to go the Davidson Academy, and others I have consulted with have said things like 'don't you want to give him a childhood?'

Only my mother who has special education in gifted children studies seems to understand what I've learned, which is that PG and G are about as different as G and mentally handicapped. Still, she is unabashedly aggressive about making sure we stay 'local' (several hour commute), and think that chasing a better educational program would tax her grandchildren by way of no extended family while growing up.

Family has individually and collectively said that if he needs that school in Reno, I should make one here, or home school. I actually put out feelers to see what would be involved in building our own PG school, but am already of a mind that I can't do this completely alone, which is what it sounds like from the responses. Responses have been negative, and I've been told by several in our network that 'I've gone off the deep end.'

On a last note, we live in our present location without deep roots. My husband works from home for himself, I am a stay at home mom for the time being, and family who used to live close by has all moved to be no closer than 45 minutes away. We see them sometimes, but not often. I find it hard to hear from them that they couldn't bear for us to leave, since they see our children so infrequently now.

So I see a few choices in our immediate future and near future. Do we move to a new 'A' school with a great gifted teacher advocate for K, go to an all G public school for grades 1-5, and then uproot our family and head to Reno? Are there elementary schools in Reno that are so well accustomed to PG that we need only uproot a few years ahead of schedule?

Alternatively, do we make do with what we have here and supplement his education from home, i.e. never move to attend the Davidson Academy?

Have I gone off the deep end?

Lots of question from a scattered mind this morning. I'm sorry for the long post, but just didn't see how to cut it down and still present my dilemma. Thank you for enduring this post.