I was actually thinking about this a bit recently as well. A friend of mine just posted on Facebook something like, "We had a great day at our house today, found out DS got into the gifted program at our school." And I can't explain why this made me feel weird. Sure, she should be proud of her kid. I don't really have a problem with it in theory, but my ds was also accepted and I would never have posted that on facebook. It just doesn't feel right to me. The only place I wrote about it was here because I feel like people here would understand that it isn't like winning an award, but trying to make sure his education meets his needs.
As for his actual abilities, I don't lie about it or downplay it, but I also don't start many conversations about them, although I do sometimes discuss books he's reading which happen to be way above grade level.
But part of thinks, who cares, maybe I should have replied "DS too!" to my friends post. But it just didn't feel right to me.
