First off, get rid of your "normal" thinking when it comes to the reality of having a PG child. We started my son with a program from day one that would seperate his academic life from his social life.
Group 1 - When he was four we enrolled him in a small church Sunday School that had mulitple grades per class - thus a wide range of ages, but we did sort of pressure at one point to move him ahead but only to stay with the children he had become good friends with that were 2 to 3 years older than him.
Group 2 - He also attended Chinese school at this church, on Sunday afternoon, and while some people from the church attended there were other people there also and a wider range of ages (beginners all together regardless of age). If this hadn't worked we would have found another activity not age based.
Group 3 - Outside sports activity. While he tried soccer when he was 3.5, he started taking martial arts at the YMCA when he turned 4 and started competing in competition when he was 5. Over the years he has switched schools a few time to improve his skill and at each one he has made friends with a wide assortment and age range of children. He has also travelled all over the country for competition and has friends all over who socialize with him over Facebook and Skype. One thing my wife and I noticed is that children who consistly compete in Sports Martial Arts seem to be smart in general, with a large majority of them getting all A's and participating in IB programs for high school.
With social activities not being an issue, we concentrated on provide him with a program where he could progress at his own rate not mine. We did home school (reading, writing, and arithmetic) till he was 7 and then started him in the 3rd grade with k12.com for a structured curriculum. He progressed through 6 years of k12.com in 4 years, taking all curriculum classes and supplementing with courses from EPGY and CTY. He started high school at Florida Virtual School (flvs.net) at age 11 as a home schooler and completed all courses requried for college in 2 years (all honors and AP, except 2 years of chinese language, with an A in every class). This was allowed because he was home schooled and not enrolled through the local school system. He began college at 13 (almost 14) this last August 2011 as an early enrollment student and this is where his social, academic, and martial arts life seem to merge.
He appears to be a bright, articulate, extremely self-confident (we feel due to the martial arts) Freshman that is maybe 17 or 18. He has gone to campus club meetings where he knew club members and officers because they went to church with him. He has seen other students on campus that knew him from other activities and friends. He is meeting new friends, some who are now going to the dojo where he teaches martial arts.
We never had him tested (other than EPGY and SCAT, SAT for CTY), we never had expectations, we have never been disappointed by his results as long as he did his best. At any point he could have gone to a regular school if he wanted, not gone to martial arts, church, or chinese school. We have simply treated him with respect and dignity and told him our job was to make opportunities available to him and his job was to decide if he wanted it (we did offer our guidance).
So just enjoy the time you have with your son and don't worry too much, unless you truly want to operate within the educational system. If you try to do it witin the system, with other people making decision for your son on what's appropriate and then you having to argue back, good luck. IMHO, opt out and enjoy!
