So the way I see the world, there are two kinds of tantrums. Wailing, high-pitched scream and tears may be just the natural stress relievers of being in a very painful situation. Your son has learned for whatever reason that who he IS is the guy who learns everything easily, and it's going to take some tears before he gets things sorted out. Or, the screams and wailing can be a way that when he is feeling very very vulnerable, that he makes sure to get your attention, even if it's the calm explanation. He knows that you hate it underneath, he can feel your pulse rise. He doesn't need you to explain for the 57th time that 'everyone makes mistakes.' Your options here and to send him to his room earlier in the process, or just tell him to put his head down for a moment to gather his reserves, or walk out of the room for 1 minutes. You aren't 'punishing him' for tantruming, but you don't have to reinforce him either, see? Pretty much words or any emotions from you are going to add fuel to the fire. Expecting him to 'take a minute' shows that you have very high expectations indeed.
I do think I need to try and nip it in the bud earlier. I do think part of the shriek is just his way of relieving stress. He does it all. the. time. for. many. different. occasions.
I should add, it's also not just when he gets it wrong....if he just looks at the page and thinks it's "hard" he can start wailing. Once he calms down enough to listen, he flies through it with no issues. It's this mental hurdle to get over first.
